Inge told her husband Harry she planned a face lift.  He said they couldn’t afford it. She thought they could; she asked Harry to show her the financial records.   Furious, he called her a shrew, a nag, and an ungrateful bitch of a wife, then stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

I saw her recently. She looked years younger than I remembered her. She brought me up to date.

“After your seminar, I realized I had a legal right to know all about our marital finances,” she said. “At dinner that night,
I told Harry that I wanted to participate and understand our marital finances. He gave me the same old stuff, told me not to worry, not to nag, just to trust him, blah, blah, blah.

“For the first time, I really lost it. I told Harry that since he wouldn’t share information, I was going to get it some other way. He didn’t believe me. He called me crazy, menopausal, said I needed a shrink. I threatened divorce, figuring that was the only way I was going to learn anything about our finances. Harry warned me that I didn’t have any money to pay for a lawyer.

 “I found a lawyer who was willing to delay payment until after the divorce. He got a forensic accountant who dug back two decades for information about Harry’s business and investments, most of which I knew nothing about. By the time the accountant was done, Harry was pleading with me not to go through with the divorce. I told him it was nothing personal, but at that point, I wasn’t going back.”

Inge’s eyes sparkled as she continued.

“The divorce was final a year ago. For the first time in my life, I had money of my own. After paying the lawyer, the first thing I did was have that face lift. While I was recovering, I read the books you recommended in the seminar. I’ve also signed up for some business and investing classes.”

“ How is Harry doing with all this?” I asked.  

“Well, I was mad at him, but still loved him. He’s a great-looking sexy man, we have the three children and we had a good life,” Inge said. “I just didn’t like how he lorded it over me about money. After the face lift, Harry kept telling me how beautiful I am, just like the girl he married, that he could never love another woman and would I consider getting together with him again. I said I’d consider it, but not without a prenup.”